Letting Go

It could be that DAY6 song, but it's also a must in life

As I am writing this, the first day of September is finally ending. And one of the things I’m looking forward to is the comeback of DAY6, my ultimate favorite K-pop rock band. I’ve written about them many times here on Substack, and they’ve also been subject to many of my writings.

But as I let September progress, I also can’t help but look back at what happened in August. August was a really hard month for me, as I felt as though I was battered in EVERY area of my life. As in, EVERY. AREA. OF. MY. LIFE.

While there are still many blessings that I’m thankful for, there are major events that have greatly affected how I’ve started to deal with life from here on. There were people and circumstances that I decided to finally let go of so as to find my peace. Because really, it could get really exhausting to always be on the generous selfless side. I realized I also needed to choose myself and choose my peace more than anything else, before I totally break down and lose myself and just give up on everything.

I also let go of a dream that I’ve been praying for a long time now. Because even as I prayed, I realized that God has been showing me my life circumstances that are not yet fit for that dream. So instead of exhausting myself in praying like a broken record, I finally surrendered that dream to God. Maybe my circumstances will change in the future and that dream can already be feasible. But as of now, I know in my heart that pushing through will only be a distraction to important priorities.

So yes, August was a month of letting go. And I’m letting go not because I lost faith and trust in God. But because I’m holding on to faith and I’m trusting in Him more than ever. There are things and people that are really out of my control now. And so instead of trying to deal with them and stressing myself, I’m letting go. Cue: “Letting Go” by DAY6.

Here is a poem draft that I managed to write for this post. It’s a poem about burning bridges and letting go of old beliefs that are no longer helpful right at this moment. I am letting go (because I know I’ve done a lot on my part and nothing good’s really happening) and letting God.

Goodbye

They said don’t burn your bridges,
but watch me pour gasoline on concrete,
light a match and release—
witness as the gray turn into black
and the blocks turn into ashes,
crumbling and falling down the waters
until the banks are not connected anymore.

They said blood is thicker than water,
but the poison in the veins has started
to scatter, infecting the organs one by one.
So let me take the water even with ashes
and inject them instead so that the blood
gush forth and stream out of the system.

Better for the water even with ashes to stay
as the dirt is harmless and can be filtered,
Than for the whole system to be soaked in
blood, and die from your poisonous beliefs.

They said your time will come,
but the time is only now and I'm exhausted
of waiting for a seemingly dead end.
If my time will indeed come, then let it come.
I will decide when that happens. But since
nothing is coming, then there's nothing to do.

Goodbye to all that these hands can no longer hold.

~ Kring Talladen